Friday, June 29, 2012

Post-Dentist Breakfast

Take a tip from me. If you go to the dentist in the morning and get an anesthetic injection to numb the area s/he’ll be working on, wait until the numbness goes away before eating breakfast.

I visited Dr. Wendy Wakai (an excellent dentist, by the way) yesterday and had a filling replaced, and since it was a morning appointment, I skipped breakfast, figuring the wife and I could go out for an early meal afterwards.
The left sides of my upper lip and tongue were numb, but I figured, what the hell, I can eat on the right side, and if things dribbled out of my left side, I could make fun of myself … like that old stage routine that Bill Cosby is well-known for.
So I’m kinda munching on my chili omelet at Zippy’s, using only the right side of my mouth, when I sensed some tough gristle on the left side. I didn’t want to chew it up, but I did bite on it. It kind of felt like I was chewing on a piece of rubber. It happened again. And again. Surely, the chili couldn’t have contained that much gristle.
You know what it was? My lower lip. See? à
That activated my “Be Careful” button. For the rest of my meal, I held the left side of my lower lip down with my finger. Have you ever tried eating that way? It’s not easy. But it is funny. The wife kept laughing at me, saying I look like my grandson does when he sticks his lower lip out before he starts crying.
Around that time, I noticed that I couldn’t really taste my food either. Food has to travel around the mouth, touching all parts of the tongue and being chewed on both the right and left sides to taste good. Otherwise it’s a totally incomplete experience. But at least I didn’t dribble my coffee.
For the first time in a long time, I brought at least half of my meal home to be reheated and eaten later when my lip and tongue were no longer numb.
Unfortunately, that’s when the bite marks on my lower lip started first to tingle, then to hurt.
I have to go back to the dentist today so she can work on another tooth, but I tell you what … this time I’m waiting until the numbness is completely gone before I eat anything.

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