Sunday, October 16, 2011

Two Does Not Equal Three


The most recent Oceanic Cable internet service television commercial just goes to show that no matter how careful you are, if not everybody is vigilant, something will go wrong.
Here’s what I’m talking about.
The commercial makes quick cuts to various people – many of them well-known to Island residents – touting the speed of the cable company’s Road Runner internet service: “Fast!” “Twice as Fast!” and so forth.
But the problem is two of the exclamations used just don’t jive. One person says “Two times faster!” and another says “Twice as fast!” The two phrases don’t mean the same thing.
At the risk of sounding horribly didactic, let me explain: “Twice as fast” means just that. Something is going at double speed.
“Two times faster,” on the other hand, actually means something is going at triple speed. If something is one time FASTER, then it’s twice as fast. So it stands to reason, grammatically speaking, that TWO times faster means something is traveling THRICE as fast.
So I ask, which is it? Is Oceanic’s internet speed three times faster? Or is it only twice as fast?
I wonder if heads should roll over this major (not to mention embarrassing) faux pas that people can make fun of?

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