We’re ready for the hordes of kids that miraculously might
appear at our front stoop on Halloween demanding a treat – a bribe – so they
won’t have to play a trick on us.
Ah, who’m I kidding? We haven’t had any Trick or Treaters
come to our door in a long time. If you’re wondering how long, I just figured
out they stopped coming around the time my eldest son outgrew the custom –
1981, if you can believe that.
Thirty years. Thirty years since I’ve seen a costumed kid
grace our doorstep carrying a pumpkin flashlight, with his/her parents hovering
in the background watching to see if their little kids remember the right words
to say with the right inflection that they’ve practiced for so long.
Thirty years. But the wife remains the eternal optimist and
buys treats every year, sometimes even putting them in special Halloween goody
bags.
This year, she spent $7.50 at Costco the other day to buy a
huge jar containing 70 bags of pumpkin-shaped pretzels. She IS ready for Halloween.
Futile effort? Maybe, but she’s got that covered. We do have
a bunch of kids in the neighborhood, replacing the ones that (like my sons)
grew too old to mess with kiddy things like blackmailing the kind neighbor
folks and demanding sweets.
The wife plans to hand-deliver these pretzels and other
blackmail payments personally.
Kind of pitiful, huh? Oh well, if it makes her happy, who am
I to argue.
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