Face Sculpture

Here’s something I never saw before my most recent trip to Las Vegas – Face Sculpture from an artist working at the Fremont Experience, downtown Las Vegas.

For a mere $30, you can have a sculpture of your face created before your very eyes. You just sit there in front of the artist (and dozens of curious spectators), and she’ll transform a lump of what looks like plaster of Paris into your visage.

Y’know, like those white busts you see lining the Roman walls in Biblical movies. The finished product is actually quite good (at least to my uneducated eyes). Now, would I get one and have it on display in my home … hmmmm … wait, I’m still thinking about it.

Small frames are available for $18.99; large ones for $28.99.

Horrible English … Cough, Cough

There’s a television commercial by Children’s Triaminic Night Time Cold & Cough Syrup that has me shaking my head whenever I see it. You know how grammatical errors just pop out at me? Well this commercial is a perfect example.

According to the spokeswoman, Triaminic uses what they call “perfect mix technology.“ This is so “… the medicine is always evenly distributed to help your CHILDS get the right amount of medicine every time.”

This is so wrong that it hurts to repeat it.

Let me belabor the point:

1. If they meant to say “child’s,” then they left out something. Child’s what?
2. If they did mean to say child, then they shouldn’t have said “child’s,” because that’s a possessive noun, not a subject noun.
3. And if they meant more than one child, then they should have said “children.”

If it were me, I would hunt down and fire the copywriter and the ad account executive who signed off on the commercial.

Luck of the Irish Wilts

It was getting kind of boring to hear the sports announcers and analysts keep talking about how Notre Dame had the "luck of the Irish" this past college football season.

They (especially former Notre Dame coach Lou Holtz) kept talking about how third-year Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly had a chance to win the BCS championship because, after all, didn't four Irish coaches accomplish that feat during their third season? Isn't that what the luck of the Irish is all about?

Let's look at a couple of numbers:

First, the number 3. A clover has three leaves. Ara Parsegian, Frank Leahy, Dan Devine and Lou Holtz won their national championships in their third season. Brian Kelly was playing for the BCS championship at the end of his third year. Three. Right?

Okay, now the number 4. A good luck clover has four leaves. There were four Notre Dame coaches who won championships just before they entered their fourth year. Four, right?

The pundits forgot something. If four coaches accomplished that feat, each used up one leaf of the lucky four-leaf clover. Four coaches, four lucky leaves. Right?

That left Brian Kelly standing out there at the 50-yard line all alone, a championship game loser holding a regular three-leaf clover. Four minus three is one. One coach, one championship loss at the end of his third season. And in this case, one coach plus three leaves does not equal the other four coaches.

Too bad, Manti Te'o. No maraschino cherry to top off your sundae.

The Little Paris Kitchen

There’s a new show on The Cooking Channel that I’ve been watching – The Little Paris Kitchen: Cooking With Rachel Khoo – that airs on Saturdays. It’s actually a BBC (British) production that’s shot in Paris.

Rachel Khoo is British, born in Croydon, South London, of a Chinese/Malaysian father and Austrian mother. A former fashion industry public relations person, she owns a small restaurant (actually, her apartment), and can at most handle two diners per reservation. That’s why she calls her show “The Little Paris Kitchen.” She says that she’s been told that getting a reservation at her place is harder than getting one at famous Parisian restaurants.

The kitchen itself is about the size of a small walk-in closet. There isn’t any room for a kitchen range, so she has a counter-top stove and a teeny, tiny oven. Her fridge is also small, and she has to store her appliances (e.g., mixer) in cupboards.

But her dishes are easy to make, and her English accent is very easy on the ears. She’s also leprechaun-pretty, with raven bangs and bright (usually pink) lips. Cute (maybe that’s why I like to watch her show).

While working as an au pair in Paris, Rachel earned a pastry degree at Le Cordon Bleu, then ran baking workshops at La Cocotte, a cookbook store. She’s written two books in French: Barres à céreales, muesli et granola maison (“Homemade muesli bars, muesli and granola”), and Pâtes à tartiner (“Homemade spreads”).

Her most recent book, The Little Paris Kitchen, is in English and is the basis of her television show, which began airing in Britain last March.

Wanna read more about her? Go here: http://www.rachelkhoo.com/

Stocking Up on Crosswords

I began my crosswords obsession in 1972 when I started work at the Honolulu Board of Water Supply's Community Relations Office. I came on board when there was a lull in the action, and found myself with quite a bit of time on my hands once I'd read all of the material in there.

Believe me, within a couple of weeks, I was just as knowledgeable as anybody else in the office ... not that there were that many of us (only four, including the secretary).

So every day, I did the crossword puzzle in The Honolulu Advertiser (morning) and The Honolulu Star-Bulletin (afternoon). The Advertiser puzzle was harder, but I soon mastered both. I then moved on to big Sunday Star-Bulletin & Advertiser puzzle. That was challenging. Plus, they were free with the newspaper subscription.

Anyway, the reason for this little walk down Memory Lane is because I went to Barnes & Noble yesterday and replenished my supply of Sunday crossword puzzle books – one book of 54 puzzles, four books of 72 puzzles each, and a fat mega puzzle book with 300 puzzles. Sixty bucks worth, the harder and more challenging, the better.

The clerk at the register gave me a look (they always do that), as if to say, "What? Have you no outside life?" or, "You don't look THAT intelligent." I just say, "This'll hold me for a couple of months," and smile enigmatically.

I prefer the spiral-bound ones because the covers can be folded back, making it easy to work them. As for the fat book (which I keep by my bedside), I generally rip out the page when I've done one side, then turn it over and do the other side, tossing the sheet away when I'm done.

One of the regular books stays in my travel carry-on bag to be worked on while flying, or in my hotel room.

And yes, I do them in pen (the complimentary hotel room pens are perfect).

The Circus Circus Midway

Visiting the upper-level midway of Circus Circus casino in Las Vegas recently brought back lots of memories of the attraction.

The first time I wandered the midway was nearly 50 years ago, back in the mid-'60s, when my friends and I went to Las Vegas during one of those three-day weekends. No, we didn't stay at the Circus Circus, it was too expensive ($20 a day, I think); we stayed at a downtown motel for $6 a room, two to a room.

But I digress. The midway then was different than it is now. There were quite a few adult-oriented side-show attractions, including four that I vividly recall:

1. A mad-scientist experiment where electricity was sent coursing through a lovely woman, turned the scantily clad young lady into a raging gorilla that broke out of the cage and charged the audience, sending us careening out the entrance, trampling small kids and deafening us "normal" college boys with high-pitched girly screams.

2. A strip show with teaser women gyrating outside the "tent," enticing us hormone-driven young men to come on in and see what went on in there. Yep, we went in, anticipating bare breasts. But y'know how that goes, they don't call it a strip-TEASE for nothing.

3. A tic-tac-toe champion chicken. If you beat it, you won a cheap prize. If not, well, you were out a quarter. I lost, my friends lost.

4. A chicken-munching boa constrictor. It was past its lunchtime, so we didn't actually get to see it, but someone described it to us: People stood around a large ring that was walled off with a foot-high fence. A live chicken was thrown into the ring and it clucked and strutted around for a while. Then, a huge boa (6-8 feet at least) slithered into the ring and stalked the chicken until it was cornered. It then struck with its big mouth and proceeded to strangle and swallow the poor bird.

Now, all they have are carnival games, no side shows. Still, it was a nice, nostalgic wander around the center ring where an aerial artist named "The Fabulous Alexandra" was twirling high above the audience.

I wonder what the midway will look like 50 years from now.

Eel Knock You Over

While having dinner at the Chart House in Las Vegas (Golden Nugget Hotel & Casino at the east center of the Fremont Experience), I spent a bunch of time checking out the fish in the huge aquarium they sat me next to.

Suddenly, without warning, a huge yellow moray eel about three-and-a-half feet long came swimming by right in front of me. I didn't have a chance to turn on and focus my camera in time to catch it swimming, but I did photograph it when it stopped at the opposite side of the aquarium.

You can't really see its teeth, but believe me, they're there. And I thought it was pretty funny that when I did snap a few pix, the one that came out clearest was the one above ... the only one that showed someone's head between its jaws.

I guarantee you, that'll never happen again.

The Auto Collection

Click on Picture for a Larger Panoramic View

There’s something about old cars that look as though they just rolled off the factory floor that stirs something inside me, and whenever I get in that ol’ “Gimme a Classic Car” mood, I search out collections and auto shows.

It had been a while – many, many years, in fact – since I’d seen the antique auto collection at the Imperial Palace Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas. So the last time I was there (early December), I made it a point to check it out again.

First of all, let it be known, in case you didn’t know, the Imperial Palace is now called “The Quad” and is undergoing extensive renovations. Just finding the valet service was like negotiating a maze. Once I found it, though, the valet attendant treated me like royalty. I guess being an old guy in the rain has its benefits, huh? People tend to give you more attention.

Anyway, the second part of the maze was negotiating the halls and elevators and inadequate signage, trying to find the darned place. Eventually, I did, though, and guess what? The woman selling the tickets had the same birthdate as me … Oct. 14, 1944, in case you’re taking notes and want to send me something next year. So instead of just the senior price of $8.00, she gave me an additional 20% discount. Shhhh, don’t tell anyone, she said, it’s a secret.

There are more than 300 cars on display, each with the pertinent information, including age and selling price. The most expensive one there is a 1961 Aston Martin DB4 GT Zagato Lightweight, one of only two built, and selling for … get this … $10 million. I checked my wallet, but was a little short, so there went that dream bubble.

I spent at least an hour and a half wandering up and down the aisles, pausing occasionally to wipe the drool from my lips. I tell you, auto buffs would be in Heaven at this museum.

Check out just a few of the cars:

1929 Packard 640 Custom Eight Roadster, $175,000

1951 Mercury Barris Custom ... "The Rose," $185,000

1955 Chevrolet Bel Air 2-Door Hardtop, $65,000

1961 Volkswagen Micro Bus Double-Door Camper, $85,000 

1988 Chevolet Corvette Challenge Car, $35,000

Hopefully, the next time I check out the museum, all of the hotel’s renovation work will have been completed and the same ticket lady will be on duty that day. And maybe I'll have a fatter wallet.

Makes a Lotta Cents

When I visited The Auto Collections in The Quad (formerly Imperial Palace) on the Las Vegas Strip, I was struck by this little tableau ... an American couple of perhaps the 1950s, having a picnic on the showroom floor amidst a huge pile of coins.

According to a sign nearby, the coins are donations from museum visitors, and are given to charities, among which are the Wheelchair Foundation, St. Judes Ranch for Children, the Blind Center of Nevada, the Susan G. Komen Foundation, and Child Haven, among others.

Pretty interesting, plus it made a great display. So I did what anyone with a heart would do ... I added in my two cents ... and a couple of bucks on top of that.

Dark Skies

Back in 1996-1997, I remember seeing the sci-fi UFO conspiracy television series Dark Skies on the TV schedule, but never got around to watching it. Before I had a chance, NBC cancelled it before the first season ended, after 18 episodes.

So it was with some delight that I saw the series on DVD recently. That gave me a chance to watch the series in its entirety. I immediately wondered why it took so long to come out, and learned that the reason was because of the background music … it was basically pop music of the ‘60s and the producers had a difficult time getting all the permissions and releases.

They finally found a DVD releasing company (Shout) to handle all of that.

Dark Skies is pretty intriguing. What if all that we knew in our nation’s history from the 1950s and onward was really a lie? What if significant events and personalities were actually manipulated by aliens who visited us from out there? For example, what if the Vietnam War was actually the result of Russians accidently downing a UFO? What if JFK was killed because alien-infected humans didn’t want him revealing the truth? What if … what if … what if?

The story centers around two people just out of college – John Loengard (Eric Close) and Kimberly Sayers (Megan Ward) – and the chief conspirator, Navy Capt. Frank Bach (J.T. Walsh). Capt. Bach knows all about what really happened at Roswell, when a UFO landed and then was shot down when Pres. Harry Truman ordered it.

Throughout the episodes, famous political and historical figures pop up – Robert Kennedy, Hubert Humphrey, Jack Ruby, Nelson Rockefeller, Carl Sagan, Dr. Timothy Leary, Capt. Norman Schwarzkopf, Dorothy Kilgallen, J. Edgar Hoover, Marilyn Monroe, Ed Sullivan, the Beatles, Jim Morrison, Henry Kissinger, and on and on and on.

Of particular interest was my discovery that Megan Ward, one of the principal characters, is a 1987 (I think) graduate of Kaiser High School in Honolulu, Hawaii.

She also appeared as Kate Howard in the daytime drama (soap opera), General Hospital in 2007-2010.

How ‘bout that, huh? She joins Bette Midler, Yvonne Elliman, and Kelly Preston as notable women actors/performers who went to high school and grew up in Hawaii.