Coffee Klutz

My single-cup Hamilton Beach “The Scoop” coffee maker has served me well for about a year now without a mishap … until Sunday morning.

To use it, just scoop coffee grounds into the handled strainer, insert it in the proper place, add water to the well, and press the start button. Of course, you can’t forget to put your coffee cup under the drip hole.

But before doing that, I always prepare my coffee mug with sweetener and creamer, because I’m lazy and would rather have the drip action incorporate them into the coffee. That way, I don’t have to stir it myself. Lazy, y’know.

So anyway, I did just that, and was going to close the scooper/filter lid, when my left arm bumped the protruding handle, sending coffee grounds cascading onto the shelf, the floor, and into my coffee cup. (insert 15 seconds of blasphemous cursing here).

I had to clean up and start over again. Good thing I didn’t have my eggs on the stove yet.

Okay … coffee made, breakfast made, everything’s ready at the table … plate, juice, coffee, Sunday newspaper.

I think my right arm was jealous that the left arm’s earlier action caused a lot of activity in the kitchen. It wanted equal time and knocked my full coffee cup over, creating a mocha-hued splash puddle on the table, the floor, and my lap. (insert 30 seconds of blasphemous cursing here).

Shaking her head unbelievingly, the wife (bless her heart), shooed me out of there and cleaned up the mess for me.

I may swear off morning coffee forever.