The Stella Awards, Part 2 of 2

The Stella Awards … outrageous examples of the judicial system gone horribly wrong. Yesterday I posted the 4^th- through 7^th-place winners.

Today, it’s time for the top three awardees.

Third Place

Amber Carson was awarded $113,500 when she sued a Philadelphia, PA, restaurant because she slipped on a spilled soft drink, causing her tailbone to yield to the hard floor and crack. The Lancaster woman got away with one, didn’t she, because she and her boyfriend had been having an argument. About a half-minute earlier, in a fit of anger, SHE THREW HER DRINK AT HIM.

Second Place

The owner of a night club was sued by Kara Walton of Claymont, DE, after she fell from a bathroom window to the floor and knocked out two of her front teeth. The jury said, “Pay her $12,000 plus dental expenses.” Never mind that the was trying to sneak out through the window TO AVOID PAYING THE $3.50 COVER CHARGE.

First Place

If you see Mrs. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, OK, driving a Winnebago, better stay out of her way. She sued Winnebago and got $1,750,000 plus a new motor home when the one she was driving for the first time ran off the freeway and crashed, overturning and injuring her. Sounds reasonable, until you’re told that she has set the cruise control at 70 mph, got out of the driver’s seat, walked back into the Winnebago AND MADE HERSELF A SANDWICH.

She blamed Winnebago for the accident. After all, the company never said in the owner’s manual that the driver had to stay behind the wheel while on cruise control. And you know what? Winnebago actually made a change in their owner’s manual … um, in case she wanted to buy her husband a new motor home? 

(Aren’t You Glad It’s The End?)