Oceanography 102

Okay, I passed my online Oceanography 101 course, thanks to all those brilliant 6- to 8-year-old kids who gave me all that information I posted earlier. Now for the harder stuff – Oceanography 102. Guess I’m going to have to rely on more of those kids’ email info:

• “Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers.” (Christopher, age 7)
• “When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small.” (Kevin, age 6)
• “Divers have to be safe when they go underwater. Divers can’t go down alone, so they have to go down on each other.” (Becky, age 8)
• “On vacation, my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won’t do it again because water fired right up her big fat ass.” (July, age 7)
• “The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don’t drown, I don’t know.” (Bobby, age 6)
• “My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean. What he doesn’t know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom.” (James, age 7)
• “I’m not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can’t think of what to write.” (Amy, age 6)

I know exactly what you mean, Amy. I get writer’s block all the time.

Okay, that’s enough ocean stuff. I think I’m now smarter than the average bear … I’m a Yogi Baby!