Stupidity in robbers is not only contagious, it also transcends state borders. Yesterday, I read about two would-be robbers who apparently had brain farts and forgot one of the most important lessons in Robbery 101: Wear your mask and put it on early.
The first case involved a man who heisted a convenience store in Ferndale, Michigan, wearing a Darth Vader mask. Oh sure, he had the mask on, but … he put it on inside the store.
The result? A terrific surveillance video of the stupid guy standing there full-faced, putting on the mask, then robbing the store.
According to police, the ersatz Mr. Vader threatened the clerk with a butcher knife before fleeing with the money, ostensibly laughing behind his Star Wars facemask, not realizing that he’d messed up earlier. Police say they’re pretty sure they know who he is.
About a month ago, something similar happened in Eden, New York. The robber there entered the local HSBC Bank branch wearing a dust mask around his neck.
He just waltzed over to a teller and handed over a note demanding money, the mask still dangling around his neck. So then his cell phone rings and he answers it, grabs the note back in a panic and runs out of the bank.
You know what the police think? They think the phone call was from his get-away driver telling him to “PULL UP YOUR MASK, YOU DUMMY!”
They still haven’t found the guy. Hmmm, I wonder if he moved to Michigan.
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